This Real Job - Layoff Plan

A blog about a job. A real job. Not one of those fancy jobs where people are happy. Not one of those fancy jobs that people like. This is an office job. A generic office job where no one matters and no one cares.

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Layoff Plan

Over the weekend I put together a plan to get laid off. I am almost certain that I will succeed. I see the sheer incompetence around me everyday and realize that I need to be just a little bit worse than that. My plan is:

1) Many Many offsite coffee runs everday

2) Missing meetings because I am “too busy”

3) 1.5 hour lunches almost everyday

4) getting in at 8:30am - 9:00am and leaving at 4:30pm - 4:45pm

5) Missing deadlines by up to a week

6) Talking about how little money I make ALL the time

Not enough to get fired, but enough to be a bad employee. I think this plan is perfect! Hello severance and motivation to find a job I like.